ASK DR. SCHUND (C)1994 Alan M. Schwartz Dr. Schund, is it true that we must burn fossil fuels at the maximum possible rate to save our genetic structure from radiation-induced mutation? Cosmic rays - protons of astounding energy cruising the universe at a fractional hairbreadth short of lightspeed - impinge upon our planet's upper atmosphere and transmute natural nitrogen-14 into radioactive carbon-14. An unceasing deluge of the 5715 year half-life beta-emitting isotope rains down upon us, infiltrating our brains and gonads, irradiating our genetic structure, and dooming us to cancer, mutation, physical degeneration and premature death. Our entire biosphere is hot with carbon-14. What can our response be to this challenge of pan-global extirpation? We can save ourselves! Fossil fuels were once as radioactive as we are today. During millions of years of isolation through burial their radiation has decayed. A mere 100 millennia reduce carbon-14 emissions by a factor of 185,000. A million years brings it down by a whopping ten to the fifty second power! Our only hope is to dilute the natural abundance of perpetually renewing deadly carbon-14 with the safe and non-radioactive carbon to be harvested from fossil fuels like coal, oil and natural gas. How lucky we are that our technology and civilization have already implemented the only remedy to this challenge, integrating it into the fundamental infrastructure of our lives, and abundantly so! Cultivated soil embodies more than 180 billion metric tons of carbon (Science 262 725 (1993)). The atmosphere we continually breathe weighs 5.136x10^21 grams. Of that, carbon dioxide constitutes 364 ppm by volume or, given its molecular weight of 44.01 daltons versus the air's nominal molecular weight of 29 daltons, 552 ppm by weight. We are immersed in almost three trillion metric tons of radioactive carbon dioxide. It seeps into us with every breath. It is incorporated within us with every bowl of granola we ingest. The very survival of our species - of all earthly life! - depends upon civilization's tardy realization that the Industrial Revolution and its energy dependencies are the perfect answer to this deadly challenge. They are the only answer! Burn fossil fuels, and quickly! How speedily can we decrease the glowing horror of carbon-14? Our most successful year was 1987-1988 when 19 billion metric tons of safe carbon dioxide entered the atmosphere. During 1988- 1989 Environmentalist tree huggers and fish kissers had already begun their insidious sabotage of human persistence. Only ten billion tons of pristine carbon dioxide scrubbed clean of the death that is radioactive carbon-14 by millennia of underground interment made it into our air. Statistics for succeeding years are equally grim (Science 263 185 (1994)). We are losing the war against the radioactive decimation of our kind. What would the self-proclaimed saviors of the Earth have us use for fuel? Their catchwords are "renewable resources." Rather than exploiting the safely decayed fossil fuels which lessen the concentration of radioactive carbon-14 in the biosphere, Environmentalists would have us burn fully radioactive modern wood and other cellulostics brimming with freshly acquired radioisotopes, plus government-subsidized products like ethanol therefrom. The scream their defiance. They demand the recycling of radioactive carbon-14 from fresh corpse to new victim through the air, around and around, until we are saturated with death riding the sturdy steed of 156.48 KeV beta radiation. When we use paper bags to carry our groceries we cook ourselves through intimate association with fresh carbon-14. When we use polyethylene bags we avoid additional radiation exposure. When we burn wood in our fireplaces we release carbon dioxide brimming with carbon-14. When we burn artificial wax logs or gas logs we release radiologically stone cold carbon dioxide. When we fire furnaces with "renewable resources" we renew the radiant death permeating our air. When we burn coal, natural gas, oil or discarded plastics we release carbon patiently purified of its hazard by eons of storage time. Contrast the politically correct exercise of energy resources versus the traditional ways. Is there something intrinsic to the wisdom of engineers and their decades of education and experience that is missing from malodorous children of Nature screeching New Age threats of Gaian revenge through environmental apocalypse? Drive your car, turn up your thermostat, leave your lights brightly lit and run your hot water deep! Mine coal, extract natural gas and suck gigatons of oil from God-given cisterns deep within the Earth! Surround yourself with civilization's bounty synthesized from petrochemicals! Flood the atmosphere with safe carbon dioxide! If we recycle, if we exploit "renewable resources," if we hesitate for even a single generation in our desperate quest to dilute ghastly natural carbon-14 radiation to safe levels, then we are doomed and our children cooked beyond recognition and irretrievably blasted even to the level of their genetic structure.